Aero ad: the bubble's burst

I don't know about you but I don't like the new Aero chocolate bar ad where some bemuscled hunk with no shirt on talks about how the bubbles are formed. "I didn't know that was how they made the bubbles," enthuses one girl, while another says "oh -were you listening to him?"

In print ads in magazines, they have the same hunk and presumably his charisma is supposed to be so compelling that we remember and associate it with the TV ad.

I find this "reverse sexism" pretty tired and trite for today. When Diet Coke started the "Diet Coke Break" a few years ago, which was built on the same premise, it seemed more zeitgisty and rule breaking. Now, it's just me too. Women are still used to sell cars and auto parts in men's magazines but there would still shrieks of outrage, and complaints to the ASA, if an ad like the Aero ad ran with a partially clad woman and two leering men.

I thought about showing a picture of the guy but then I would be guilty of what the Daily Mail and the News of the World do: run a critical article but then feature gratuitously a picture to feed the frenzy. So instead here is the Cadbury's gorilla.

Chocolate advertising has become as difficult as car advertising. There are no big innovations and really everything has been done. So the ads have to try to capture some of the emotion around the experience. Or, as Aero are trying to do, create some stand-out. I like the way Galaxy positioned their chocolate around relaxation, sinful luxury and reading. All good things we associate with chocolate. Their sponsorship of the Richard & Judy book club plays into this.

I am less impressed with the Cadbury gorilla - although all the guys at the ad agency love it (though I wonder if that's because they are in the industry, rather than a chocolate eating member of the public). I wonder where they will take it. It was also too derivative for me of another campaign where a man is seen playing the drums, and when he turns round, you realise he's quite old. I can't remember the brand, but the message was clear: challenging perceptions.

Testing: Eve Lom

Occasionally I get a bee in my bonnet about wanting to use an entire, co-ordinated theme of skincare products. Thus it was that last week I was in Selfridge's buying the Eve Lom range.

Now I don't know why I succumb to this sort of behaviour. There is really no reason to use an entire range from one manufacturer, even though they like to insist that the products work better together.

When I've done this before, it hasn't always been successful. I remember spending literally hundreds on products from the Kanebo range, and the Dramatically Different range from Clinique a few years ago. Neither gave any improvement. Deep down I believe that how your skin looks is hereditary, coupled with what you eat and drink. I try not to drink too much alcohol - it really has a bad effect on my skin - and I try to eat lots of fruit and vegetables, plus I take certain vitamins and supplements. But nonetheless, I am still a sucker for marketing. So what provoked the Eve Lom assault?

Lately my nose has been a bit red, which, as I don't drink very much, I put down to inflammation or irritation. I've been using a Vichy cleanser, a Mignon toner (which is marvellous for preventing spots) and a Decleor moisturizer, plus a weekly exofoliation with a Murad product. Anyway, something among that little lot has been disagreeing with my skin.

I've often read rave reviews about the Eve Lom cleanser, which comes with a muslin cloth. I've only had it for a few days but I have to say it's really fab. The cleanser is a fairly thick balm which you apply to your face. You then hold a hot cloth against your skin for five seconds, three times, then removing the cleanser and finally closing the pores with the cloth soaked in cold water. The hot and cold water treatment feels lovely, and my skin seems to be looking less blotchy and irritated.

Eve Lom only prescribes moisturizers if the skin really needs them. I did buy the moisturizer but I'm not slathering it on for the sake of it. So far, my skin seems moisturised enough (it tends to be dry on the cheeks). The eye serum doesn't seem as good as Decleor Hydrotenseur. That really does give a lifting effect. And I'm quite disappointed with the hand cream. It feels nice, though smells a little strange, when you first apply it, but after 30 minutes your hands feel parched again. I can't really give an opinion yet on the cuticle conditioner. I still have to test the Rescue Mask. It is apparently very good for congested skin, a problem I suffer from occasionally. More later!

Guilt free meals for big appetites

As promised, here are some of my tips for overcoming the biggest issue facing most dieters: hunger.

It's very depressing to look at what you're supposed to eat when you're dieting. Matchbox size cubes of cheese. Palm of the hand sized protein (as if a steak is that small!).

As I mentioned below, I find calorie counting works well for me and I use the Nutracheck website which also advises you on the fat content and how many portions of fruit and veg you're having a day.

I usually have All Bran with stewed blackberries for breakfast; a mid morning treat of a skinny latte; soup and a slice of Burgen soya and linseed bread for lunch; an afternoon snack of a banana or a Sainsbury mini houmous pot with an organic pitta, and for dinner, something along the lines of:
- Sainsbury Taste the Difference thick cut oven chips with a TTD chunky cod loin in breadcrumbs with half a tin of mushy peas. If you compare calorie content in the supermarket, you'll see that many of the so-called "Be good to yourself" meals have the same, or sometimes more, calories than the "Taste the Difference" range. The oven chips are slightly higher in calories and not so good! So make sure you do the comparisons.
- Sainsburys Mushroom Stir fry with 100g turkey breast, sliced, and half a container of Sainsburys Green Thai stir fry sauce. This is wonderfully satisfying: you get a huge bowlful, it goes a long way towards your "5 a day" and it's really quick to make. I like to have it when I get back from aqua aerobics.
- Sainsburys Taste the Difference slightly smoked salmon fillet with a small jacket potato and 45g of grated cheese; carrots, peas and runner beans.

I make sure I don't go over 1400 calories a day. Last week I lost three pounds but it's more usual to lose one to two, depending on how much exercise you do. If you have a lot of weight to lose, you'll lose much bigger amounts each week in the first few weeks.

Soup for lunch is a healthy, quick option. I sometimes make my own and freeze some it: Gillian McKeith has some great recipes. Or if I'm in a rush, I'll buy Covent Garden soups which have healthy ingredients (no E numbers) - but make sure you check the calorie content as some of them have a lot more than others! Tomato and chunky vegetable is a nice one.

I absolutely adore cheese and houmous, so I have to make sure I include these, in very small quantities, otherwise my diet fails. Sainsburys now do a three-pot set of mini houmous pots, which is excellent news. They're 90 calories each. If I'm running out of calories, I eat a pot with cucumber crudites and cherry tomatoes, as pitta breads are higher in calories than the actual houmous.

I get my cheese fix in a cheese & onion sandwich on Sundays served with Quavers which are fairly low calorie for a snack (88 calories).

Don't make the mistake of going for foods marked "low fat" for slimmers. Quite often these have more sugar, or sugar substitutes, in them to make up for the lack of fat. I'm a big believer in going for the "real" thing - such as butter and not those disgusting tasting spreads - but in small quantities. That's what successful dieting is all about, let's face it.

Sometimes I cook from scratch and create my own recipes. You can enter these into Nutracheck and it will store the recipe and give you the calorie total. I make a good spaghetti bolognese with decent quality steak mince (not the low fat steak - it has no taste) cooked on its own to get rid of the fat; oions, garlic, mushrooms, red wine, herbs, tomato puree and a tin of tomatoes, and then adding a little Sainsburys Be Good to Yourself bolognese sauce. The drawback with this is that by the time you've added a small amount of pasta, you have a fairly high calorie meal, so I only have it if I've skimped on calories during the day.

Ten pounds to lose, eeek!

Despite my good intentions over Christmas, the festive season combined with a cessation of my aqua classes, a trip to Las Vegas and too many cocktails have resulted in me putting on 10 pounds!! Eeek.

Last night the DH and I agreed we would start another race to lose half a stone (I'm keeping schtum about those extra pounds). We did this last year: I lost 10 pounds, he lost about the same, but as we'd both said we wanted to lose a stone, neither of us claimed the reward.

The prize this time is a weekend of walking for him if he wins, and for me, noise reducing headphones from Bose.

Last night we had a curry to "celebrate" the end of our bad ways, and today I went to the gym and he went for a run, which he does six days of the week. I remembered why I find going to the gym such a FAFF. Firstly, you have to assemble all your kit. For me, two sports bras and the usual shoes, trousers, top; the iPOD fully charged and its arm sleeve thing; heart rate monitor; bottle of water; two towels (I decided to wash my hair). It's much easier to go swimming, or aqua, because all you need then is your swimming costume, flip flops and a towel.

I've booked to go to aqua three times next week, and I'm back using Nutracheck, the online calorie counter.

Today I've been eating lots of fruit and veg. My skin is dry and spotty (if that's possible) after all the air con in the US plus the poor food there.

I'll keep you posted on progress - plus some of my diet secrets including how to create huge great meals for those with big appetites that still allow you to lose weight!

Tested: Proto-col collagen tablets, Crest White Strips, Bliss Thinny Chin Chin

I consider myself an indefatigable tester of new beauty products, pills and potions and am happy to share my findings with you, dear reader.

I have been taking Proto-col collagen tablets for two months now. The theory is that we lose more and more collagen from the age of 35 upwards, with resulting slackening of skin tone. The capsules, three a day x 400mg, are supposed to improve skin, hair, joints and nails.

I wasn't sure about the merits of taking collagen like this, in capsule format. I'm aware of collagen injections, but who knows if collagen taken internally does anything for the skin? I have yet to find any official research.

I haven't noticed any real difference to my skin, to be honest. And no improvement to my nails, which have become very weak in past months. But one thing that did improve, after the first dose, was joint pain. I have an elbow which I think is afflicted by repetitive strain injury (it can't be tennis elbow!) and after taking Proto-col, the pain had gone completely. It wasn't permanent, but it does make a difference. I've taken glucosamine/condroitin and green lipped mussel extract and neither of those made any difference.

On another subject, have just been to the US and the inevitable trip to Sephora. There I bought some Bliss Thinny Chin Chin, which is aimed at firming up the decollete and jowls. After applying it for the first time, I can confirm it definitely tightens up the skin: you can feel it doing this. I don't think it lasts long, but good for a party!

Also in the US, I bought some Crest White Strips. You couldn't buy these in the UK the last time I looked, although I believe they're available now on the web. I bought the premium kit. You apply the strips to your teeth twice a day for 30 mins and after seven days you're supposed to see a difference. I had my teeth bleached a few years ago and they've been looking a bit yellow lately so I thought I would try it. I'll let you know how I can get on.

Note to Victoria

I see Mrs Beckham was voted worst dresser in Mr Blackwell's list of 2007. Highly justified, judging by the latest photos of her in a lime green ensemble. I noticed in Hello recently that both Katie Holmes (one of VB's friends) and Angelina Jolie were seen sporting glamorous outerwear at red carpet events. Outerwear? Yes, shock horror, a stylish raincoat in the case of Ms Jolie, and a gorgeous coat in the case of Katie. Let's hope their example will put paid to the spectacle of VB, and hundreds of ladies in Newcastle, wearing sleeveless dresses at night with no coat and no tights!

Detox - don't do it!

It's at this time of year (New Year's Eve) when everyone starts guiltily counting up the cost of Christmas in terms of weight gain, bloating and puffy eyes. You may also be thinking of some draconian New Year's resolutions to do with losing ten stone or joining a gym, or going on a detox. My advice? Don't do it!

Of course it's great to put our bodies first, and commit to eating sensibly for 90% of the time. And I do try to do this. But in my experience, joining a gym in January and making some pretty demanding resolutions is a bad idea at this time of year. January is a gloomy month anyway. Don't be too hard on yourself. If you want to resolve to improve some aspect of your life, do it in a gentle way. If you want to lose weight, maybe try to walk 10,000 steps a day using a pedometer -- and if you're still doing it in six weeks, then join a gym because your resolve is good (and you will have lost weight). Or resolve to lose a dress size in six weeks' time. Or resolve to keep a food diary each day, maybe using this great site

As for a detox, complete waste of time. Scientific studies have shown that our bodies are so advanced they can "detox" very effectively on their own even if you've consumed your own body weight in kebabs and steam pudding washed down with a month's alcohol units. Those special detox drinks are nothing but a con, and taste foul. Exponents of detox say you will feel light headed, maybe have spots - all signs the body is expelling waste. Nonsense - it's the cry of help from a body which is being starved and unable to respond effectively to the demands you're making on it.

So don't detox but instead aim to drink a lot of water, avoid pre-packaged foods full of transfats (pies, pastries, biscuits, ready meals) and include at least five portions of fruit and veg in your daily intake.

My own resolutions this year are about continuing to go to aqua aerobics, three times a week, and to walk more. I aim to eat sensibly 90% of the time and have been doing this in general. There were a few lapses over Christmas of course but I was happy to go back to a healthier regime a couple of days ago. I have another resolution which is to go to the theatre/cinema more often, and I'm looking forward to buying some tickets online shortly to make that one come true! It starts tomorrow with a trip to the Tutankhamnun exhibition. Have a Happy New Year!

The Dangers of Reading Vogue

I am and always have been an inveterate reader of magazines. My first hit was Teddy Bear comic followed by Princess Tina, Pink and Diana when I was a child, moving swiftly on to Jackie, Fab 208, NME, Honey, 19, Over21; flirtations with The Face and Wallpaper and then Cosmopolitan, New Woman, Marie-Claire. Even when I was married I used to secretly buy wedding magazines and swoon over the dresses. And now I get my magazine fix with about six craft magazines a month, monthlies Eve, Red, Delicious and Woman & Home, and occasionally others like House Beautiful, Zest, Easy Living. And very, very rarely: Vogue.

If I'm in a waiting room I usually reach for the Vogue and find myself thinking how interesting some of the articles are, and why don't I ever buy it?

Well, today dear reader, I did buy it. I knew my DH was going to watch The Bourne Ultimatum, and if there's one thing I find very perplexing, it's those Bourne films where Matt Damon seems to travel the world at breakneck speed always being pursued by the CIA or others, for what reason I can never fathom as he never seems to know himself.

Anyway, the only magazine on the shelf I hadn't read, apart from those completely beyond the pale like Prima or Heat, was Vogue. I was so desperate last week I even read OK and Gardeners World.

The thing with Vogue is that it makes me utter this sort of anguished, swoony sound. It's a sort of choked sob. It's because I get this pang because I'll never wear the massive rocks in the jewellery ads, or drive the flash sports cars in the ads or wear the clothes in the ads or features (o0r be thin enough, even if I had the money and/or confidence to walk into one of those shops).

And then there are the parties with ridiculous socialites posing smugly in their Chloe or Gucci clobber. This issue also featured very sickening interviews with three British top models. Lily Cole, all of 19, is buying some glam apartment in Manhattan and frets about having enough space for her clothes. Agyness (whatever happened to Agnes?) Deynes shares her hectic diary where she seems to rush from one party to the next, staying at the Dorchester in between parties (as you do). Sigh. I never went from one party to the next, even when I was their age. God, I'm jealous.

Now, parties are to be dreaded and largely avoided for fear of getting lumbered with someone boring: plus nowadays I rarely get "the glad eye" from anyone which used to make parties worthwhile. For me, the anticipation of a party and the buying of a frock and evening bag is the best bit. Once you've gone in, had the ums-and-ahs for your attire and one or two dances, you might as well go home and see what you taped on Sky Plus.

The dreaded D word

When I was at my mum's this weekend, she observed that it must be very hard for me to keep the weight off as I still have a very good appetite.

Sadly, that's very true. While I am nowhere near Victoria Beckham's proportions, and never likely to be, I am a couple of stone lighter than I was back in 2004 and I've tried to keep it that way. I'm happy being a normal BMI and size 12. I would love to lose another stone, but it probably isn't going to happen because food is one of the joys of life and I would hate to be on a regime the whole time.

To lose weight, and keep it off, you have to find a system that works for you personally. I went to a class once and hated it, but for some people WeightWatchers and other classes are wonderful. I've tried most of the blockbuster diets but I now realise there's no mystique to it. Calories go in, calories go out. There's a certain number you need for your build and level of activity. It doesn't matter how these calories are consumed. You could eat three Mars bars and be under the limit (although obviously the nutritional value would not be great!). And you could eat an extra Mars bar if you exercised a lot.

So the way that works best for me is calorie counting. This way, I don't need to ban foods. If I want to eat something high in calories occasionally, I can balance it out by lowering my intake the following day.

I like carbs too, particularly potatoes, and I refuse to acknowledge the mumbo-jumbo that is written about carbs. Provided you build your potato intake into your calorie target, there's no reason why you can't eat potatoes. When I lost two and a half stone in 2004, I did it with a jacket potato every day.

Eat too much protein and yes you get thin, but you look older, your breath smells and you lack energy. A balanced diet which includes the right amount of carbs and healthy fat is very important to me.

I find the online calorie counter Nutracheck excellent. First you enter your height, weight, how much activity you have and so on, and it gives you a target date. Then, every day in your food diary you enter the barcodes of many everyday foods from Sainsburys, M&S and so on, and it counts up your fruit and veg portions a day too. It's an excellent educator to guide you into how many calories various things are. And you can also enter the exercise you do, in my case water aerobics, intense effort, three times a week.

Earlier this year, after my Cyprus holiday I realised I was 10 pounds over my preferred weight, and it made a big difference. So I made a concerted effort to lose two pounds a week. Some weeks it happened, others I had to go to business lunches or whatever. The key thing is not to allow a lunch or a dinner to derail you. You can start again the next day.

Christmas poses its own unique challenges. I would love to indulge myself in all my favourite foods: quiche, Scotch eggs, dips, crips, cheese, trifle, dark chocolate - not to mention a huge roast and lots of cocktails. But I find it's better not to be tempted. So I won't be buying most of those things. I suppose it sounds as if Christmas is a bit bleak at my gaff, but we'll still have a big, normal roast, and a small amount of some of the "naughties." But neither of us sees the point in stuffing to excess and then going into the New Year with the miserable task of having to shed pounds. As they say, a minute in the mouth, a month on the hips......

I also find that over indulging leaves me feeling tired and lethargic. I start to crave salads and vegetables. So I plan to cook lots of nutritious meals with healthy ingredients, and will drink plenty of water to offset the schooners of sherry!

In search of radiance

One of my friends told me I haven't updated this blog for ages. So here are some suggestions on how we oldies (40+) can find that elusive glow that you take for granted when you're younger.

I quite often look at myself in the mirror and sigh "not exactly radiant!" But there are a few tips and tricks for giving the illusion of smooth glowing skin. The famous Beauty Flash Balm from Clarins, and an equivalent product from Decleor never really worked for me. I find them quite drying and you have to be quick to apply make-up.

If I've got time on my hands, or I'm preparing for a party, then finding radiance can be quite a process. It starts with Elemis's gorgeous Papaya enzyme mask. This is a deliciously scented cream which acts like an exfoliator and gets rid of all the surface dry skin. I don't like exfoliators very much - they are all, to my mind, harsh and drying, but this Elemis product is like a hybrid exfoliator and mask.

I follow that with my beloved Decleor Hydrotenseur eye firming serum (the best eye product I've ever used) and on my skin, Decleor Experience de l'Age moisturizer which claims a triple action for wrinkle correction, firmness and radiance. Well, you can't argue with that, and it certainly feels lovely with a melting velvety texture.

Now for make-up. Women over 40 should always use foundation. Tinted moisturizers don't offer enough cover. I don't like a heavy foundation but I opt for one that gives light to medium coverage and has an illuminating effect, usually by Chanel or Estee Lauder (I love Lucidity). Then I use Yves St Laurent Touche Eclat in areas that need lightening: around the nose, corners of the mouth, the circles under the eyes (but not close to the lashes). Blusher is the final touch, and it needs to be a cream blusher, never powder. I like Nars The Multiple in Portofino. Mascara and lip gloss complete the look, and by now you should be looking fairly radiant!

If time is tight then I rely purely on the Decleor moisturizer and serum, Touche Eclat and blusher.

Colouring your hair at home

I've been colouring my hair since I was, oh, 14. My first product was a Rimmel semi permanent: they came in little glass bottles, and it was an auburn shade. Unfortunately we had a fire alarm the following day school and it was raining. Standing out in the playground the dye started to run down my face. Very embarrassing.

It didn't put me off though and I carried on happily experimenting. Toners, Harmony, Color Glo, mostly in red shades; one foray with purple (not a success) and black. Black was hideous. I looked like Morticia Adams. It made me look washed out. And I must have neglected a big piece of hair at the back because a child on the bus said loudly: "Mum why has that lady got a big brown bit of hair at the back?"

I even tried blonde, fleetingly. But I have very dark brown hair and it was pretty much a disaster. It went quite gingery so I had to do it again. It was OK, I even passed as a Swede in Sweden, but the first time I did the roots retouch, I couldn't get them beyond ginger and then tried to go back to brunette which was harder than you'd think: it went mousey, and I had to use two packets of permanent dye to get it to the right shade. Fortunately because my hair is what hairdressers call "strong," it recovered without looking too much like horse hair.

Now I colour my hair every five weeks using a dark reddish brown from Nutrisse. I have three criteria for a permanent dye: it needs to go on dry hair (I can't be doing with wetting the hair first, and then having it drip dye down my back); it needs to smell pleasant and not remind me of the awful chemicals it contains, and it needs to cover grey well.

I'm not too grey, just around the hairline. Some products are too red and make the white hairs a shade of orange, but Nutrisse blends them in perfectly. Sometimes I wonder if my hair is too dark for my age (very ageing apparently) but I tried a lighter shade of red and it went too orangey after a couple of weeks. Red is very difficult to maintain.

My tips for successful home colouring are:
1) Leave dramatic changes and highlights to the professionals.
2) Smear Vaseline around your hairline before you start, to stop the dye staining your forehead.
3) Make sure you drape plenty of old towels around the floor: darker dyes are terrible for staining. My partner loathes me colouring my hair so I do it secretly, and have to make sure there is no evidence in the bathroom (stains or marks anywhere). I usually take my rubber gloves and bathroom cleaning products with me to give the bathroom a clean while I'm waiting for it to take.
4) The applicators that come with most kits are useless for getting dye into the hairline. So I always use the tray and little brush that comes with the Nice n Easy root retouch product. I find the brush is excellent for the hairline, and I simply rinse it out each time to use again.
5) Always follow the instructions and don't wait any longer, or keep dye for later.
6) Always use a conditioner every time you wash. I find the ones designed for coloured hair are the best. I used to use those for red hair, but found they were making it too red, so I now use those aimed at brunettes. They help to prolong the depth of the colour and give a nice shine. I've tried all of them and like Pantene best. If you don't use a conditioner, and occasionally a deep conditioning product, your hair will feel very coarse and dry and won't shine at all, and then you'll have the helmet hair typical of home dyers (if that's a proper word!).
7)If you've used a shade for the first time, write down what it was. It's easy to forget which one it was when you're next in the shop.

Diet pills, patches, teas or sprays: all a big con

The excellent Channel 4 programme "Cook Yourself Slim" has, every week, exposed a dieting product as being useless. It's been gratifying to see slimming patches, a slimming spray and slimming tea (apparently used by Posh Spice) revealed as rubbish. They always run the legend "this does not constitute a clinical trial," but have you ever noticed how few of these products ever go through proper clinical trials? They don't because the results would be so bad no-one would buy the product. We do, however, swallow whatever hype they throw at us, because we're all looking for a quick fix to lose weight.

I recently tried, against my better judgment, a new slimming pill called TrimSecrets. Michelle Mone from Ultimo is their testimonial customer and I suspect she is also co-marketing the product, because I receive emails "from the desk of Michelle Mone," as you do for Ultimo.

So, what's in a TrimSecret? Well, the dinky tin contains a calorie controlled diet sheet. It's a sensible diet. You're encouraged to drink a lot of water and exercise. All good. Then you're supposed to take one of the capsules three times a day.

The capsules, we're told, contain only natural ingredients, and looking at the list, most of the ingredients have been associated with speeding up the metabolism: green tea, vitamin C, chromium for example. There is also caffeine and guarana extract, both stimulants.

In the first week of using TrimSecrets I lost 3 pounds, which was good but not surprising because I was very enthusiastic about my new regime and exercised a lot. The second week it went down to two pounds and the third, one pound, which was a rate of loss of I would have expected without using the pills.

Unfortunately though the pills had side effects for me. Nobody mentions side effects among the glowing testimonials on the TrimSecrets website. But the stimulants meant I couldn't sleep, so I had to take the third pill much earlier in the day; and I started feeling generally nauseous (the caffeine) and quite low. As soon as I stopped taking the pills, these side effects eased.

I have tried herbal slimming tablets in the past - Zotrim comes to mind - but in my experience, they're useless and no substitute for a low calorie nutritious diet, exercise and willpower. Sadly.

The same goes for all the "miracle" treatments you can have at the beauticians which claim to reduce your weight by pounds, a dress size and so on. I mentioned one of them on this site, Universal Contour Wrap. There are many others, and watching "Silicone Chicks" on Discovery Health, you see how gullible women are. An overweight woman tried a treatment which, she was told, would reduce her measurements by an inch in three weeks. She had lots of treatments at around £40 a time I think it was, and did lose a couple of inches, but she was also using a personal trainer and so that's how she lost that weight. I expect the treatments gave her nothing more than smoother skin and a damaged bank balance.

My advice would be to spend the money on a personal trainer or, failing that, some delicious food that will indulge you as you diet - seafood, turbot or steak.

A Perfume Odyssey

I probably buy two or three perfumes a year. Yesterday I bought Bluebell by Penhaligon. It's a one note perfume, the sweet nostalgic smell of bluebells. I love most of Penhaligon's perfumes particularly Malabah and Violette, which always reminds me of my gran (although she wore Yardley's April Violets).

I'm never tempted by the big splashy perfume launches these days, and I would never buy a "celebrity" scent. All I smell there is something fishy, as celebrities lend their image to some putrid smelling cat's pee in a bid to make a fast buck. They're never going to be remembered scents.

My first ever perfume was Yardley Sea Jade when I was about 12. Next I was given Dorothy Gray's Midnight one Christmas, but I didn't care for it much. I think my mum was harking back to her own youth when she got it for me. Pretty Peach by Avon was marketed at young ladies but I didn't like it: I considered myself too grown up! A girl I knew vaguely, who had a bit of a lisp, is called to this day "Pretty Peach Ruth" by my mum and me, because she confided that she had some Pretty Peach hand cream! My mum was an Avon lady so I had exposure to a lot of Avon's perfumes at that time, Elegance, Somewhere, Topaz, Occur! Here Is My Heart, Elusive and Moonwind.

Next in my perfume odyssey came Aqua Manda or was it Kiku? One of those Faberge perfumes that were all the rage in the early 70s. The big one for me was Charlie, a real breakthrough perfume in all respects. It was different, it was confident and it epitomised a new type of young woman.

I was getting a regular kit from the Universal Beauty Club, a motley collection of perfumes and cosmetics, mostly by companies you'd never heard of. My mum was thrilled when a bottle of Californian Poppy was among the haul, but boy did it smell of cat's pee.

In my 20s I would succumb to marketing hype and occasionally buy brand new perfumes: Vivienne Westwood's Boudoir, Estee Lauder's Knowing, Byzance by Rochas. There was many perfumes I flirted with but didn't really love: Cinnabar (I liked it but it was not really me), Cabotine de Gres, Magie, Lumiere, Joy, L'eau d'Issey and very briefly Giorgio Beverley Hills (but everybody else wore it).

My second "breakthrough" scent was Diorella by Dior, originally launched in 1972 as one of the new generation of chypre perfumes. I first smelt it on a friend I'd met on a women's management course, and I couldn't resist buying it (even though perfumes often smell differently on other people). I still love Diorella and have a few drops of eau de parfum left, saving for very special occasions, because Dior only make it now in eau de toilette.

I first wore Diorella back in 1989 so there have been a few perfumes since then, among them Dioressence, Chanel 19, Chanel no 5, Cristalle, Miss Dior Cherie and Aromatics Elixir. All passing flirtations however.

Some perfumes are so evocative they instantly remind me of someone who wears them. My mother used to wear Alliage and Elizabeth Arden's Memoire Cherie (no longer available), and I can still remember how they smelt. I combed the web to find Memoire Cherie and eventually found an original soap, in America, which I bought for around five dollars. But my mum admitted later she'd gone off it. And I doubt if I could wear Charlie now.

My sister-in-law Sarah has worn many scents but to me, Cinnabar is the one that reminds me of her. One of my best friends Julie is synonymous with Opium.

There are some perfumes I truly detest: Youth Dew, Shalimar, Poison, Mitsouko, Tresor, anything with roses (I don't believe you can capture the smell of roses in scent) and the latest vogue of scents that all smell the same - the Britney / J Lo / whoever fragrances.

My belief is that the market for heritage and long forgotten perfumes, plus made-to-measure scent, will become huge as women of my age and older decide they want to have a unique wardrobe of perfumes rather than the same old scents churned out by the global perfumiers.

In search of the perfect eye cream

I first bought a specialist eye cream in my early 20s. It was by a luxury brand which doesn't exist now, Charles of the Ritz, and was a pearly pink. In those days I was looking for something to deal with the hereditary dark circles under my eyes. Now, I want an eye cream that helps with those plus hydrates and plumps the fine lines. The two needs are not mutually compatible. Most of the creams I have tried for dark circles a) do not work and b) are drying. I tried Clinique's Uncircle and when in the USA, rushed off to get Hylexin, "a dark circle breakthrough." It didn't improve the dark circles at all and I stopped using it because it was so drying.

I then switched to creams which hydrate and feel comfortable on the skin. My favourite was always Decleor Hydrotenseur serum, which feels wonderfully light and soothing and seems to eradicate fine lines. Last week, having run out and nowhere near a Decleor stockist, I bought Chanel's Rectifiance Intense retexturising eye cream. Initially I thought it was good: it seemed to hydrate and plump out the fine lines. Unfortunately, after using it for a few days, the skin around my eyes became red and sore so I stopped using it and reverted to a sample of Decleor Vitaroma which was such a relief.

I have now re-ordered Hydrotenseur from a very good website in the Channel Islands, Beauty and the East. They usually despatch on the same day, postage is free to the UK, and they usually include a few samples. There are often discounts for regular customers. Today for example I got 10% off, which was not insignificant when I bought both the eye serum and a new moisturiser(Experience de L'Age Triple Action Cream). Far better service than you get in most of the department stores!

I find that the expensive eye creams are far better than the cheap ones. Olay's Regenerist made my eyes red and sore, and L'Oreal's Collagen Filler Eye was drying and ineffective. Others which were no good for me were Clarins and Estee Lauder's Resilience Lift.

The best fix for the dark circles is to drink plenty of water, have enough sleep and use a light application of Yves St Laurent's Radiant Touch. If you're heavy handed, you get the reverse panda look as sported by Caprice.

Posh: Keep Lindsay at Bay - get her quilting for the day

I read that Lindsay Lohan (my partner said "Lindsay who?" Sums it up well) recently declared a wager saying she would "get" David Beckham.

I hope poor old Posh isn't getting too wound up about it. I wouldn't want her to go off her food. I mean, Lindsay Lohan?! What does she have going for her? She's been in a few teen films, she's had a few brushes with the long arm of the law, she's been in and out of rehab a few times (and still only in her early 20s) and she was turned down by George Clooney. Not a very impressive list of credentials, is it? She's not very appealing physically either, gingery with freckles and gawky. She plainly thinks she's a man magnet, although Calum Best, one of our best known idle layabouts and a recent squeeze of hers, is hardly in the same league as David Beckham, or George Clooney.

Still, if reports are to be believed, she's about to be fired from her studio so I guess she will have a bit of time on her hands. Posh, Machiavelli advises us to know and befriend our enemies, so my recommendation is that you meet Linds for a glass of that weird tea you drink and get her quilting for charity. Anything to help rehabilitate her image (her own advisors can't seem to do it) and keep her away from your husband.

Update on Smart Lipo, 10 weeks on

Thanks to all the readers who left comments with their experiences. The message seems to be that you need to be very patient if you've had Smart Lipo: the results can take three to four months to take effect.

Well it's now 10 weeks since I had the treatment, in two areas on my stomach (above and below the navel). I wanted to lose my belly bump in time for my holiday. I'd arranged to have Soft Lipo two months before my holiday, and asked if it would show an improvement in that time. I was assured it would. Well, to be perfectly honest, my stomach probably did look worse, two months on. I still have a ridge of fat that sticks out above the navel. You can see it from the side, even if I suck my stomach in, and if I wear something tight. So I wasn't as carefree on holiday as I hoped. I did wear bikinis.

I haven't had the recommended endermologie treatments. Unfortunately the salon ranfg up and cancelled my first session, at fairly short notice; and as this meant I could only squeeze in one session before my holiday, I didn't bother.

My advice to anyone considering Soft Lipo would be:
1) Be realistic about what it can achieve. I think I was expecting too much. Soft or Smart Lipo only removes a tiny amount of fat. If you want to see a big improvement, you should consider conventional liposuction.
2) It's best confined to small areas where diet and exercising has failed to make a difference.
3) Anticipate at least three to four months to see a final result. So if you're having it done for a holiday, wedding, etc, make sure you leave enough time.
4) Contrary to the advice I was given, the coagulated fat DOES seem to disperse faster if you exercise more vigorously. But wait at least a fortnight before you start exercising again.
5) You may have unsightly pouches or pockets of fat for several weeks after the procedure. This is the coagulated fat, waiting to be metabolised (it has to go somewhere!). This can often look worse than the site did originally.

Please keep adding comments if you've had the treatment or are considering having it.

In all honesty, with hindsight I would not have had it. That £3k would have been better spent, for me, on Lasik eye surgery. I have now embarked on a proper fitness regime and I expect that in six weeks or so I will have achieved better results than the SmartLipo.

Buying a holiday wardrobe

Off to Cyprus on Wednesday! Part of the pleasure of a holiday, for me, is the leisurely showering and hairwashing after a day in the sun, and then applying a glimmering body lotion, just a little make-up and a new outfit: a pretty dress or a floaty skirt and top, accessorised with a cute little bag and sandals.

I not only book the holiday in January, when it gives me something to look forward to in the dark months, but I start buying clothes in the winter too. This silk blue top by Mandolin I bought at the Swindon designer outlet back in Jan/Feb. I love the teal colour.

The cream dress with the embroidery, left, was bought in Marks & Spencer, a snip at just £45. I have a bag (shown) and matching shoes from Monsoon which are the same soft coral solour as the embroidery. Next to the dress is a floaty skirt, £35 from Marks & Spencer.

In La Senza I bought two bikinis, both with shorts (more flattering than briefs): the cherry print, shown, and a red and white polka dot. I love the flip flops which go with the cherry print. On the back of the chair is a red cover-up, also from La Senza. Ideal for lunchtime or for buying an ice cream and not wanting to walk over in just a bikini.

I like to buy a new beach bag too. The basket shown is from Marks & Spencer (£15) and I bought a new bag charm from Boho Fashion Jewellery (£18).

Helena Rubinstein no longer sold in UK

I was very sad to learn that Helena Rubinstein has withdrawn from the UK. I didn't see any stories about it but saw an announcement on their website when I went to search for their fantastic Golden Beauty range of self tanners, by far the best on the market (compared to Guerlain, Estee Lauder and Dior).

I would imagine that differentiation was their biggest challenge. They didn't stand out from the other brands. I'm in marketing and I would have struggled to guess where they see themselves, who their target customer is, and their positioning relative to the other luxury brands. They obviously decided the UK was not a focus area some time ago and their promotional activity was virtually zero: a pity, when some of their products were outstanding (I lived in Germany a few years ago and used to buy HR a lot then).

They still seem to have a presence in many other countries including Belgium and Germany. So I wonder why the UK was a problem? It's been on the wane here for a number of years, and I was finding it increasingly difficult to buy HR in the UK.

Yet they're using Demi Moore as their muse, and with the over-40s the most affluent, cash-rich market and more likely to spend money on beauty products, I see a huge missed opportunity for HR. Please at least consider selling online from your worldwide site!

The brand has a terrific heritage: Ms Rubinstein was a very formidable woman, up there with Estee Lauder. It's a shame to see the brand silently disappearing from one of the world's biggest beauty markets without any sort of analysis or fanfare.

Universal Contour Wrap really works!

In the interests of research, ladies, and as desperation sets in (two weeks today before my holiday starts), I am embarking on a course of Universal Contour Wrap.

It's had rave reviews and you are assured to lose several inches after one treatment; after the optimun number of three you can even potentially lose a dress size.

Of course it's not real "weight," but some sort of detoxing product which probably rids your body of water and "toxins." It all sounds like mumbo jumbo from what I've read, but hey, everyone agrees it seems to work, and they guarantee the results for 30 days. You can read about it here.
I wasn't expecting it to be a pleasant or relaxing treatment. Most of the online reviews told about "freezing cold" and paint a picture of you being trussed up like a chicken with nothing to do for an hour.

On the contrary, I quite enjoyed my first treatment. First you strip off completely, with just a pair of delightful paper knickers on. A charming and capable beautician at Evie Adams, Woodford Green, first jotted down all my measurements; she then applied a pleasant smelling mud, and finally, the bandages, which are wrapped round you so that you resemble a mummy. It's quite tight but not horribly so. The bandages are warm at this point.

You then put on a ludicrous pair of trousers and a jacket that have elasticated ankles and sleeves. By covering up the "goo," you can then lie down on the couch and read for an hour.

After the hour, your measurements are taken again. And hoorah, I had lost eight inches including one off my waist and two off each leg (one inch from the top of the thigh). Well, I was very pleased with this - and my normally tight jeans were easier to pull on.

I've decided to commit to the other two sessions (a course of three is recommended for best results, at a week apart).

Another piece of good news. I have found a wonder waist cincher! The Esbelt corset from Brazil can apparently even encourage inch loss. I wore it for the first time yesterday and instantly lost about two inches from my waist. It was comfortable, and at the end of the day when I took it off, my waist remained smaller! So, very impressed with it, and the service from Brazilian Lingerie who were very quick and sent a complementary pair of fishnet tights. The waist cincher costs £27.

SmartLipo update: 5 weeks on

My last post on my SmartLipo was a fortnight ago: it's now five weeks since I had the procedure in two areas of my stomach and midriff.

I'm sorry to report there's very little progress. I still have hard lumpy deposits which are visible from the side and look very peculiar. They are a little smaller than they were, but I can't say my stomach looks any better.

Disconcertingly, I used a sun bed today and the lumpy areas did not tan! So they look even more peculiar, islands of white standing out like a beacon.

I'm getting quite gloomy at my chances of wearing a bikini on holiday in less than three weeks' time. I might, for the first time in four years, have to buy swimming costumes or tankinis. It's a depressing thought, particularly when you spent £3000 to improve an area you hate, and it now looks worse.

I've booked two Endermologie treatments which are supposed to help. These are offered free of charge (the first two) following the procedure, except for £20 to buy the garment that you wear during the treatment.